[It only takes her a moment more, then she's tugging one bag of hash browns out from under the box, shoving the rest loosely back into place on the shelf before turning to walk back towards him.]
They're okay.
[And maybe for most people she'd leave it there, but Derek had saved the dogs as well as her, and the fact he's even asking after them means something to her. She's only ever dealt with people other than her caring about her dogs on board the ship.]
Colt hasn't shown any lasting damage. Had to get Jabber's leg bandaged up, but she's healing. [A pause.] Might not grow fur there again though.
[ the way derek says that makes it obvious that he thinks that's the most important, that anything else was just a footnote, something to be recovered from and dealt with. ]
[She feels like she wants to say thank you again. They're alive - she's alive - because of him. It is the most important part, and she's never going to forget it, even if she doesn't say as much, looking at him and then quietly passing him the bag of hashbrowns.]
[ he doesn't want to hear thank you. derek never wants to hear it. he takes the hash browns, starts fussing with the oven, the pans. derek's style of cooking is bare bones, no frills. he doesn't remember the last time he cooked hash browns, but he can't really dwell on that, give himself room to fuck it up. ]
[That the hashbrowns are going to go in, obviously. She closes the freezer door behind them, more thankful for the cut in cold air than she'd like to admit, follows him along through the kitchen.]
Do you want toast? [She pulls herself up to sit on the counter near where he starts setting himself up, close enough to watch and carry on talking, but keeping out of his way.] You can cook up enough for you, too.
[ derek cuts a sideways glance, looking at her, gauging the tone of her voice and the sincerity of her offer. derek tries to think for a minute of what he would want, if he could have any food for the asking. he comes up with nothing. derek doesn't have much in the way of preferences, not even now. ]
I shouldn't eat all your hash browns. [ there's faint amusement in derek's voice. ] You don't have to offer.
[She huffs, slightly, half a laugh. That hadn't been what she'd meant at all, though she realises belatedly that enough for him might seriously be that many. He had to get the energy for all his werewolf stuff from somewhere.]
I got three bags back. [Because of him. And her not-entirely-lucid rambling, but she doesn't really want to bring that up again.] You can have a few.
[He likes to point out the things she doesn't have to do a lot, even when she knows them already. This time she doesn't even argue, just ignores it completely.]
[ it's easy, what they're doing. it's easier than derek realized it could be, just sitting in the kitchen cooking with her and her dogs. it's the kind of normal he doesn't think exists in his life. he keeps waiting for it to implode ]
They're yours.
[ three bags or not, it won't last that long, and derek doesn't want to take any of that away from her. ]
[She reaches over, taking the bag off him and fishes four more out before she lets him take it back.]
I don't wanna eat on my own anyway.
[She might not know if she'll ever get any again, might have hidden them away so no one else took them, but as far as she's concerned, sharing them with Derek doesn't count as any kind of loss.]
[ derek's grumbling under his breath, but he lets her. he lets her because he doesn't feel like arguing over it, because she's pushing the issue. there's lingering discomfort, but he pushes it aside, focuses on what he's doing. ]
I'm glad I heard you.
[ which is a touchy subject, but one derek thinks he has to bring up, at least to let her know that what she did was alright, that he wasn't upset about it. ]
[She's rolling the top of the bag up, a loose attempt to seal it, but has to pause when he says that. She looks up at him, not sure what to say- thank you, again, maybe. That she's glad too. But she feels suddenly like she's back in the medbay after dealing with the pirates, only there's the element here of the thing she wasn't meant to be doing, listening to Derek's mind, speaking to him that way (controlling him).
She hasn't realised how much it's been worrying at her until he says that, says it's okay. It's on her face in that moment, clear in her expression, but she doesn't know what to say, how to articulate it. She looks away.]
[ he sees it. derek sees it because this is his wheelhouse, guilt and worry, things he knows in his own face, is good at spotting in other people. he knows how to find it in isaac and erica and boyd, stiles and scott, people he's familiar with. he doesn't know when he got familiar enough with her to pick it out. he spends some time thinking on that, letting her slice the bread, fussing with the stove, before-- ]
You weren't.
[ derek knows what it is to feel the weight of someone else's intentions, to be used up and cast aside. it wasn't the same, what kate did, but he thinks it would feel the same. ]
I came because I wanted to.
[ with the unspoken statement being, not because you made me. ]
[The long moments of quiet don't make any words come easier to Taylor. Even staying silent a second longer after he speaks again. It's a reassurance he didn't need to give, could have just left her with her thoughts, her worries. She wants to say thank you again, but it doesn't seen sufficient for everything he's done, everything he's still doing - staying around her, cooking for her.
She turns from the counter where she's been slicing the bread to watch him, his back as he moves at the stove, finally just reaches out to rest her hand on his upper arm, squeezes slightly.]
Eat with me.
[It's already half agreed on: she'd argued him down to it. But there's more in it as a request, asking for his company, asking if he wants to spend the time with her.]
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How are the dogs?
[ a roundabout way of asking how she is, but evasiveness is derek's wheelhouse. ]
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They're okay.
[And maybe for most people she'd leave it there, but Derek had saved the dogs as well as her, and the fact he's even asking after them means something to her. She's only ever dealt with people other than her caring about her dogs on board the ship.]
Colt hasn't shown any lasting damage. Had to get Jabber's leg bandaged up, but she's healing. [A pause.] Might not grow fur there again though.
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[ the way derek says that makes it obvious that he thinks that's the most important, that anything else was just a footnote, something to be recovered from and dealt with. ]
Give me the bag, I'll get started.
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[She feels like she wants to say thank you again. They're alive - she's alive - because of him. It is the most important part, and she's never going to forget it, even if she doesn't say as much, looking at him and then quietly passing him the bag of hashbrowns.]
I brought bread.
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For toast?
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[That the hashbrowns are going to go in, obviously. She closes the freezer door behind them, more thankful for the cut in cold air than she'd like to admit, follows him along through the kitchen.]
Do you want toast? [She pulls herself up to sit on the counter near where he starts setting himself up, close enough to watch and carry on talking, but keeping out of his way.] You can cook up enough for you, too.
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I shouldn't eat all your hash browns. [ there's faint amusement in derek's voice. ] You don't have to offer.
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[She huffs, slightly, half a laugh. That hadn't been what she'd meant at all, though she realises belatedly that enough for him might seriously be that many. He had to get the energy for all his werewolf stuff from somewhere.]
I got three bags back. [Because of him. And her not-entirely-lucid rambling, but she doesn't really want to bring that up again.] You can have a few.
[He likes to point out the things she doesn't have to do a lot, even when she knows them already. This time she doesn't even argue, just ignores it completely.]
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They're yours.
[ three bags or not, it won't last that long, and derek doesn't want to take any of that away from her. ]
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[She reaches over, taking the bag off him and fishes four more out before she lets him take it back.]
I don't wanna eat on my own anyway.
[She might not know if she'll ever get any again, might have hidden them away so no one else took them, but as far as she's concerned, sharing them with Derek doesn't count as any kind of loss.]
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I'm glad I heard you.
[ which is a touchy subject, but one derek thinks he has to bring up, at least to let her know that what she did was alright, that he wasn't upset about it. ]
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She hasn't realised how much it's been worrying at her until he says that, says it's okay. It's on her face in that moment, clear in her expression, but she doesn't know what to say, how to articulate it. She looks away.]
I can slice the bread.
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You weren't.
[ derek knows what it is to feel the weight of someone else's intentions, to be used up and cast aside. it wasn't the same, what kate did, but he thinks it would feel the same. ]
I came because I wanted to.
[ with the unspoken statement being, not because you made me. ]
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She turns from the counter where she's been slicing the bread to watch him, his back as he moves at the stove, finally just reaches out to rest her hand on his upper arm, squeezes slightly.]
Eat with me.
[It's already half agreed on: she'd argued him down to it. But there's more in it as a request, asking for his company, asking if he wants to spend the time with her.]